


Rise

by allofuswithwings



Category: Muse (Band)
Genre: Angst, Complicated Relationships, Fluff, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Showbiz Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:01:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27636529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allofuswithwings/pseuds/allofuswithwings
Summary: Matt is up to watch the sunrise in the snowy landscape of Switzerland.  He assesses his complicated relationship with Dom as the drummer joins him out in the cold.
Relationships: Matt Bellamy/Dom Howard
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Rise

**Author's Note:**

> Imported from Livejournal/Dreamwidth. Originally published June 2011.

~

_February 2000_

~

Matt let his gaze draw across the lake as he sat down lower in his seat, tugging the collar of his jumper higher around his neck. It didn’t help very much; he shivered against the chilly air.

The water was flat and still, like grey glass reflecting the wide expanse of the early morning sky. Nothing moved yet; he hadn’t seen anyone else up around the shore, nor a single bird mark the sky with its small, dark silhouette.

But even he wasn’t usually up this early. The continuous string of small shows across Europe meant late nights most of the time; there was little chance of early mornings unless absolutely necessary to catch a flight. Though, the last few weeks had provided a free day here and there, and Matt had decided to come early to Switzerland with Dom for the snow.

They’d been exhausted from skiing and snowboarding the previous day, stumbling to bed at a much earlier hour than they’d seen in a long time. Consequently, Matt had risen early that morning and wandered out onto the downstairs deck of their cheap hotel.

Watching the stillness of the trees upon the hillside and the water in front of him filled Matt with a strange sensation. It was like looking at a painting or photograph of a faraway destination that one longed to holiday to. Except, he was actually there.

Sometimes he forgot, had to remind himself, when they toured. He was _in_ Switzerland. Or Germany. Or France. Or wherever they happened to be. These places he’d never been to before and only heard of – or sometimes _not_ heard of. Matt was here now, experiencing them. Yet he still felt detached, outside it all.

He supposed it was the silence too. A sense of complete and utter nothingness permeated everything, as though the whole place were holding its breath. Nothing dared make a sound, lest it shatter the delicate balance that seemed to exist here. It was not something that Matt was used to – the quiet. England was never this peaceful. Well, very little of it anyway.

Here, Matt could feel his thoughts turning over and over in his head. It made him realise the speed of his own brain. And the longer he spent in the silence, the stillness, the more his surroundings seemed to hush him, tell him to slow down. In a strange way, he kind of liked it.

Matt reached into his pocket with numb fingers, foraging around for his cigarettes. He lit one and took a drag, the smoke he exhaled not looking all that different from his regular breaths in the cold. But the fag warmed his lungs, and he knew the nicotine would soon begin to buzz through his veins.

The scent of his cigarette seemed to vanish the instant the smoke dispersed. Yet there was no wind, not even a breeze. It was as though the air around him purged it from existence to restore the pristine state it had been in before he ruined it. He had a habit of doing that – spoiling things. It’s wasn’t malicious; it was just the way things seemed to turn out with him.

Matt turned his head as he heard the deck door open behind him. Dom emerged sporting similar garb as himself, only the drummer had the foresight to wear gloves and a bomber jacket as well.

He threw Matt a sleepy grin as he wandered over, taking a seat beside the singer.

“Can I bum one?”

Dom tipped his head in the direction of Matt’s cigarette.

“Sorry, last one,” Matt replied.

He took another drag before holding it out to Dom. The blonde gave him a slightly puzzled smile but took the cigarette, bringing it to his lips. Matt forced himself to look back out at the lake, tucking his hands inside the sleeves of his baggy jumper.

He coughed a little and rubbed at his nose. When he looked back, Dom was watching him, finishing the cigarette with a lopsided smile on his face.

“What?” Matt asked.

He fidgeted and frowned to himself.

“You look cold.”

“Because I am. It’s cold out here.”

Dom stubbed the cigarette out on the arm of the bench.

“Then why are you out here? It’s much warmer inside.”

“I couldn’t sleep anymore, and I needed to get out of that rat-hole room.”

“Did you think of dressing for the weather then?” Dom grinned.

Matt shoved him in the shoulder with his own.

“Shut up, wanker.”

He pulled his arms tighter around himself and curled his legs up on the bench. His trainers squeaked against the plastic surface.

Matt looked up as Dom slowly shuffled closer to him.

“Here, you tit.”

The blonde slung an arm around his shoulders and pulled him against his body, Matt’s head dropping instinctively under Dom’s chin.

Matt knew he was being weak, and he didn’t like it, but couldn’t help himself. Especially after what had happened a few weeks ago. All his best laid plans to keep Dom at arm’s length went out the window as soon as he was around the drummer.

Dom’s arm curled tighter around him, and Matt fought the urge to sigh with contentment.

“Better?” Dom asked.

Matt thought it best to play it nonchalant.

“Not really. Your jacket is cold.”

Dom smiled, tilting his head back to look at Matt a moment. Then he lifted a woollen hand to his neck and unzipped his bomber jacket. He manoeuvred Matt so he fit flush against the side of his body, wrapping the rest of the jacket around him to envelope them together.

Matt felt his heart start to thump loudly in his ears, the warmth of Dom’s body heat quickly dispelling the chill within him. The singer allowed his head to drop down onto Dom’s shoulder again, closing his eyes a moment as the scent of the blonde flooded his nostrils.

“How ‘bout now?” Dom asked, his lips brushing Matt’s temple.

Matt coughed, opening his eyes.

“Yeah, better.”

He tucked his hands inside his sleeves again and cast his eyes back to the lake once more. He could see the small, dark shapes of waterbirds on the other side now, tracing patterns across the surface. Several lights had begun to glow in the houses and hotels upon the shore, and Matt knew the tranquillity he’d felt earlier was disappearing.

He watched his breath cloud in front of him, mingling with Dom’s.

Dom reached down to take hold of Matt’s hands that were still curled in his sleeves, bringing them close to their faces.

“Bet your hands are still cold though; they always are.”

Matt lifted his head, eyes flicking over Dom’s face.

“Yeah. You know what it’s like with my shit circulation. It takes fucking ages before they get warm.”

Matt’s body tensed as Dom opened his mouth to breathe on his hands, attempting to warm them inside the woolly fabric of the jumper. His gaze met Matt’s, looking at him from under long lashes, lids dipped. A slight smile curled on his lips as he continued to blow warm air over Matt’s freezing digits. Then Dom’s gloved hand work one of Matt’s out of the sleeve, capturing it and bringing it closer, his mouth brushing against Matt’s knuckles.

Heart now pounding in his chest, Matt pulled his hands away and tucked them under his armpits. He sniffed and shifted his gaze away, watching a lone figure across the lake walking their dog.

“What?” Dom asked after a moment.

Matt looked back to the deep, grey eyes he’d been trying to avoid.

“You know what,” he replied. “You can’t do that.”

Dom tipped his head.

“Who said I can’t?”

Matt frowned, sighing.

“ _You_ did.”

Dom coaxed Matt’s hands back out from under his armpits, guiding them into the warm space between his bomber jacket and his body. A lazy smile pulled onto his lips again.

“What did I do that for?”

Matt allowed his hands to remain where they were, if only for now.

“I dunno.” He shrugged, looking down at the way his body moulded to Dom on instinct. “You didn’t want things to get complicated. You wanted to be free to fuck whoever you wanted and not have to worry about the emotional bollocks. Which I’m fine with – you know that. But it means you can’t do stuff like this.”

Matt removed one hand to gesture to their position. He rubbed at his numb nose with his fingers and then looked up to meet Dom’s eyes.

“It’s what makes things complicated,” he added.

Dom was silent for a few moments, his lips drawn to one side in thought. He then exhaled slowly, still smiling slightly.

“Well, that was a bit of a rubbish idea.”

Matt raised an eyebrow, wary.

“Like I said to you after we fucked; you can’t have it both ways,” he reminded Dom. “Either you want it to be simple – just getting laid – or you want something more substantial, something inherently messy.”

“But it hasn’t ended up being either of those. It’s just been… well, nothing really.”

“It’s been friendship – back to how things were. There’s nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all.”

Dom rubbed at his own ruddy nose.

“No, there isn’t. It just…”

He brought his eyes to Matt again, his gaze tracking over the singer’s features in thought. He then leaned his face closer, grazing his nose and lips against Matt’s cheek.

Matt tensed again.

“I think I changed my mind,” Dom murmured. “I want more than that.”

Matt closed his eyes and took a deep breath in through his nose. He couldn’t just give in to Dom’s whims like this.

He removed his hands from Dom’s jacket to stop the drummer, as lips began to work their way along Matt’s jaw.

“More than this, in what way?” Matt questioned. “Getting a fuck once in a while, or something… something else…?

He gestured with his hand.

Dom chewed on his lip and drew his eyebrows together.

“A relationship…?”

Matt exhaled a shaky breath, eyes searching Dom’s face. He couldn’t tell if it was a question meant for him or Dom himself.

Matt knew what _he_ wanted. The gravity of his feelings for the drummer had hit him like a bus right after they’d slept together. So the precise nature of their relationship, the depth of it, had been left in Dom’s hands. It had not been unexpected that Dom had wanted it to remain simple. Matt didn’t see what was different now to warrant Dom’s change of heart.

“Is that what _you_ want?”

Dom tipped his head to one side, looking out over the lake now too. He was silent a few more moments, eyes tracking back and forth across the water, before turning back to Matt with a wry smile.

“Yeah. It is.”

Even Dom sounded surprised at his own answer. Matt watched him carefully, unsure.

“Yeah?”

Dom’s smile turned into a grin, and he nodded.

“Yeah.”

Expression still serious, Matt leaned forward to press his mouth against Dom’s. The drummer’s nose was cold like his but his lips warm and soft, and a little damp. Matt coaxed them apart, opening his mouth and sliding his tongue out kiss him properly, completely.

Half the reason was to fulfil his own wants; the other half was to see what Dom would do. He felt the knot of worry in his belly loosen as the drummer didn’t resist him. Instead, the tongue inside snaked out to meet his, wet and hungry. A gloved hand came up to the side of Matt’s face, thumb drawing along his cheekbone.

Matt kissed him harder; so aggressively that after a few moments Dom broke into a laugh against his mouth, his body shaking. The singer pulled away, ready to spit forth a diatribe on messing about with people’s feelings, but stopped short when he saw the softness in Dom’s eyes. He _was_ laughing at him, but not in the way Matt thought.

Dom threw him a wide grin and then leaned forward to kiss Matt again briefly. When he pulled away, his face remained close, eyelids low and gaze more affectionate than Matt remembered seeing before.

“You pissed off with me?” Dom asked.

“No.” Matt revised his answer when Dom raised an eyebrow at him, still smiling. “Well, I was. Just now. I thought you were fucking around with me. You’re not, are you?”

His tone was accusatory, masking the anxiety underneath.

Dom chuckled softly. He removed his glove to place his bare hand against Matt’s face, thumb tracing over the singer’s thin bottom lip.

“No, I’m not. Really, I’m not.”

Matt slid his hands back to their place within Dom’s jacket, allowing his body to return to its previous position flush against the drummer. He then shifted even closer, tangling their legs and nudging Dom’s nose with his own.

He heard signs of life coming from behind them within the hotel, but Dom didn’t move, didn’t pull away. Matt finally cracked a smile.

“So. Does this mean you’re my boyfriend, then?” he sniggered.

Dom smirked.

“Yeah. I guess it does.”

He laughed at this, causing Matt to laugh. Then the singer began to giggle, losing control, and Dom couldn’t stop either. They carried on for a while, until Matt starting coughing from the cold air.

The singer settled down, nestling against Dom on the bench, and cast his gaze back to the lake. The sun was rising now, light spilling out across the water to banish the grey and replace it with pale yellow. Matt watched as more figures began to dot the landscape, either walking along the shore or emerging onto their balconies or decks, like he and Dom.

Though the sun had yet to rise high enough to shine onto their position, Matt could feel a ball of warmth swelling inside his body, filling him up. It bloomed further as the drummer’s arm tightened around him and Dom began to mouth along his jaw with warm lips.

Matt allowed himself a sigh of contentment. The Swiss winter suddenly didn’t seem quite so cold.

~  



End file.
